As a medic, I have been privileged to deliver one baby. Yes, my non-birth-friendly medics out there, privileged to deliver. I enjoyed it. It was before I had one of my own, and it made me realize just how amazing the whole birth thing is. I do find it amazing, and incredible. I don't really care about the mess. Granted, I didn't have to clean up- the mom birthed at her house on her own bed, so someone else cleaned it up. Nonetheless, I was the lucky one who caught the baby. It's a good thing I had support there- someone else suctioned the baby's nose and mouth, and clamped the cord, and dad cut the cord. It was a good thing because I was so mesmerized by the fact that there was a brand new little life coming out of this woman that I may have taken a few extra seconds to actually accomplish those steps on my own.
Mom was amazing- she had a doula that was at home with her- she wanted to labor as much at home as possible, and then was going to go to the hospital. Unfortunately (or, perhaps for her, quite fortunately!) her second labor was only a third of the duration of her first labor! So the doula, recognizing the signs of transition (when the uterus goes from dilating the cervix to pushing the baby out), and called for the ambulance. She pushed just a few times, and out came her baby boy. He was perfect. Mom did amazing. There were no complications.
As a young and impressionable medic and woman/future-mom, I decided that perhaps home births aren't all that crazy- after all, I had just delivered a baby who did just fine! I hadn't run any "bad calls" for childbirth.
And then I became pregnant, and realized that I was intimidated by the birth process, not to mention had a husband that didn't really believe in the home birth concept, the natural birth concept, or anything that had to do with birth outside the hospital. Unfortunately, out of the half-dozen times he has delivered a baby, not one of them was "normal" or "healthy."
So a hospital birth it was for me- I put all thoughts of anything otherwise out of my head, which, admittedly, I was OK with, because it meant I could get an epidural without feeling guilty, or like I was any less of a woman! I have no regrets, and my baby was still delivered vaginally. But, looking back, I felt like I missed out on a few things, due in part to my hospital experience, and also due to unexpected complications. My water broke but I didn't begin having contractions, so I was put on pitocin. I developed a fever during labor- a sign of potential chorioamnionitis- or an infection within the amniotic fluid and placenta. This puts both mom and baby at risk of infection, causes an increase in infant mortality, and requires the use of IV antibiotics. What this meant was that my baby had to go to the NICU. I was allowed one quick attempt to breastfeed, and then my baby was taken to NICU. I did not get to "room in" with her until appx. 18 hours later. I went over to the NICU every two hours to nurse. My baby girl had an IV in her head (which is normal IV placement for newborns- they just don't have veins accessible in their arms!). As a medic, I understood this. As a mom, I bawled my eyes out for a good 20 minutes in the NICU because my child had an IV sticking out of her head!! She was also given a pacifier, which caused me anxiety due to the fact that I wanted desperately to breastfeed! I was so concerned that she would end up with "nipple confusion" like the books and stuff talked about.
What disappointed me about my hospital experience was the following:
1. I didn't get to nurse my child within the first hour of her life. It was about 4 hours later before I got to nurse her. I didn't get to experience my baby crawl up my abdomen to find the breast for herself.
2. My baby was given a pacifier without me being asked. While it ended up being a non-issue, it bothered me a bit that I didn't know about it.
3. I was really bothered by how much the NICU nurses were willing to give my daughter formula. They noticed I was exhausted (based on the timing of my labor and the inability to nap, I had realistically been up for 40 hours without sleep by the time she finally made it!), and said, "we can give her a bottle! Just go get some rest!" While I would never say that they were pushy about it, it was presented as an option multiple times. Any type of supplementation, unless at the breast, can hinder breastfeeding, and can prevent milk from coming in appropriately. I was determined to nurse her though, and so I didn't accept the help!
4. My daughter ended up a bit dehydrated, and seemed honestly hungry. She was not the calm, quiet newborn for the first 24 hours. I suspect this has to do with the fact that she was poked and prodded, and almost certainly cried quite a bit, expending more energy than she should have the first hours of her life. I wish that I could have just held her and nursed her the whole time, but I didn't get to.
5. The lack of information with regards to informed consent. I had pitocin administered, which I didn't really want, I wasn't given any sort of information about the fever and potential issues as far as risks of refusal, and same thing for my daughter. There were no options given- it was "standard protocol."
Since she was born, I have read more and more about the medicalization of birth, and with my general impression of hospital births, I understand a little why women may not want a hospital birth. I don't want to write a marathon post, so I will save my opinions for my next post :).
